Time goes by

2004-03-09 9:44 p.m.

I’m troubling others with my worries over my results. It’s not my intention to do so, but if I don’t pour out my true thoughts, the feeling will be much worse. Coupled with the fact that I’m suppose to be doing something important for the SAF right now, its hard to keep focus. Knowing that Amandae may be feeling the same as I am doesn’t comfort me, on the contrary it make me feel guilty for telling her about more dismal stuff.

Things have cleared slightly for me. Dreams may not always come true, but hope can still live on if you believe it. Or is that the case? Do we really need to wish for something that could destroy us in other ways if we don’t get it in the end? Or is there always another path draw out for us? Perhaps if religion is brought into the equation the corridor may shine for us. “Everything is possible for he who believes” was one of the themes for one year back at ACS (I). The belief over here is the belief in God—actually the phrase is part of a bible verse. I never thought much of it for it’s is hard to see how everything is possible for anyone. It seems to come true in times of pure elation and moments of unbelievable success. However, it could also mean that there is always a light somewhere in the darkness that we feel.

After exiting my camp one day, I found myself starring at the drain next to the fence. A trickle of water appeared from no where and flowed down the drain. Nothing was unusual about that until it hit a large depression in the drain. Miraculously the trickle of water found its way out of the chasm and move along, growing bigger every minute. Yet again it struck another hole but this time it stayed there. Leaves floated down from the nearby trees and I thought that was the end of it. After around half a minute or so, the water began to flow again, traveling until it was out of sight.

You probably grasp the metaphorical meaning behind the story. However, we may not always find life like the stream of water. Sometimes it may flow without any hindrances and we discover little gifts along the way—“Golden eggs”. Other times, you wonder how many more holes there are before you reach the smooth road. “There's things as we can niver make out the rights on. And all as we've got to do is to trusten” said Dolly Winthrop in Silas Manrer. (See, I can still quote.) Push on. Perhaps Amandae is right; take thing one at a time instead of trying to grab all. Even so, there’s nothing so wrong as to reach for the moon for there is more than one chance to try.

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